Danganronpa Ficlits
by doomqwer
Summary: These are some funny little danganronpa ficlits inspired by pictures i find around the internet
1. medical dolls

Gundam: He should be around here somewhere

Twogami: I can't believe you trapped Hajime's soul in a doll

Gundam: I asked him if he could help me with a ritual and he agreed

Ishimaru: Remember I am only giving to a key to Tsumiki's room because this is technically kidnapping

*The went inside and Twogami found the doll*

Gundam: Hajime are you any closer to the Realm of The Unknown?

Twogami: What?

Gundam: Well why do think I went through all this trouble by sticking Hajime's soul in a doll

Hajime doll: h-help m-m-me

Twogami: He sounds traumatized

Hajime doll: please...

Mikan: Ohhhhh sweetie

Gundam: We must hide!

Twogami: I'll go out the window you two hide under her bed *climbs over window and hides in a bush*

Gundam: Come on Ishimaru

Ishimaru: This is an invasion of Tsumiki's privacy

Gundam: do you want to hide or get tied to the school flagpole like Teruteru last month

Ishimaru: make room *they scramble to the bed*

Mikan: *walks in* Huh *gasp*

*Gundam and Ishimaru shit themselves*

Mikan: Hajime dear I'm sorry I left you on the floor what kind of wife am I? *smells him* why do you smell like...*sniffs again* Turkey?

Ishimaru and Gundam: *whisper* Damn it Twogami

Mikan: well I guess we're are skipping myself and dinner and going straight to the tub and don't worry dear I'll get those hard to reach places and at night we can try for a little one, does the name Hayana sound nice? *Exits the room with Hajime*

Ishimaru: My prayers are for Hinata

Gundam: I could not tell if that liquid on his face were his tears or Tsumiki's (hopefully) drool

Ishimaru: Let's find Twogami we need a new rescue plan


	2. vaccination day

Makoto sees a flyer for mandatory vaccination

Makoto: No way  
*after a day of whatever he goes back to his dorm and gets in bed*

Makoto: time for some shut eye  
*Rolls over and sees Mikan in his bed*

Mikan: Naegi-kun time for your shots  
*Makoto struggles while Mikan tries to inject him with a syringe*

*Next door Leon, Mondo, and Chihiro were hearing the commotion they were hearing then wall being hit and bed creaks*

Leon: Naegi can you keep it down

Mikan: Sorry Kuwata-kun I was just giving Naegi-kun what he needs  
*they hear his bed creak and grunts from both of them*

Mondo: is he getting laid?

Chihiro: What's that?

Mondo: um... she is just laying him on his bed after getting injured

Mikan: We made quite a mess huh next time be gentler  
*Leon, and Mondo are freaking out while Chihiro is just confused*


	3. Makotos worst shopping trip ever

78th class returns from a shopping trip*

Aoi: alright everyone let's put away all the groceries, Makoto mind helping me with the curry? ...

Mondo: Where the hell is Makoto

Leon: Didn't he twist his foot when he tripped and we put him in a shopping cart

Kyoko: Did anyone remember about Naegi at the time?!

Everyone: fuuuuuck *Junko laughing in the background*

*Naegi still in the cart rolls in with an oar*

Makoto: YOU GUYS LEFT ME BEHIND

Hagakure: Sorry dude we...

Makoto: DO YOU FUCKERS KNOW WHAT I BEEN THROUGH I WAS WAITING THERE FOR AN HOUR BEFORE REALISING YOU ALL LEFT SO I HAD TO SCOOT THE CART WITH MY ASS ALL THE WAY TO THE SPORTS AUTHORITY TO BUY AN OAR WITH MY CUT OF THE GROCERY MONEY AND STROKE STROKE STROKE ALL THE WAY TO SCHOOL

*Junko laughing intensifies

Sayaka: Naegi...

Makoto: I NEARLY GOT SHIT ON BY BIRDS, HIT BY CARS 3 TIMES, AND CRASHED INTO THE FOUNTAIN LUCKILY HAJIME AND CHIAKI WERE THERE TO FISH ME OUT Celeste: Gracious

Makoto: Now if you will excuse me I need to find Souda and hook this thing up with an engine or find Mikan to stick me in a wheelchair, I bid you good day

*gave 2 middle fingers and rowed his way out the door*

Sayaka: Aoi, go to Mrs. Fields and buy him a large 'we're sorry' cookie

*Junko laughed so hard she is about to puke, Mukuro hands her a bucket*

mini lit

*Gundam applying mascara*

*Souda bursts in*

Souda: Hurry up

*Gundam stabs his eye and yells then goes to kick Souda's ass*

*Gundam knocks on Fuyuhiko's door

* Gundam: Do you have an extra eyepatch I could borrow


	4. don touch mius food

in honer of oumas birthday enjoy this little ficlit

Kokichi looking through the fridge*

Kokichi: Lets see here *sees a yogurt cup*

Kokichi: come to papa

Kokichi:*sees a note* huh

Note: Do not touch - Miu Iruma

Kokichi: *throws note away*

Kokichi: what?! *sees what's written under the note*

Other Note: I mean it Kokichi! - Miu Iruma

Kokichi: What are you gonna do suffocate me in your tits ooh I'm scared *opens cup*

Kiibo: *blasts through door* You have been warned by her Excellency twice and had not heeded her warnings *charges arm canon*

Kokichi: So she hacked you so you'll activate some killer mode when I eat her yogurt

Kiibo: indeed

Kokichi: *sweats*Kiibo it's me you wouldn't hurt me would ya?

Kiibo: looking through memory files...Results found Kokichi Ouma opinion: a short pest with a shorter dick, prepare for termination

Kokichi: I hate you all


	5. overprotective skull

Jin: Do you really think I will let you be with my daughter

Makoto: Ghaaa your alive?

Jin: Not the point what makes you think you are worthy of her

Makoto: I saved her and what's left of my class

Jin: Still not sold

Makoto: eh whatever you're just a Shakespeare prop

Jin: Is that any way to address your former headmaster

Makoto: You weren't the best headmaster when you were alive

Jin: Name one time I messed up

Makoto: Leaving Kyoko

Jin: ... Give me TWO times I messed up

Makoto: The Kamakura Project, Subordinating the Reserve Course

Jin: Touché

*Makoto received a text*

Makoto: It's Kyoko, she wants me home back in the box

Jin: WAIT can't I just see her

Makoto: Fine just don't don't make it weird for her she just left Death's Grasp

Jin: WHAT

Makoto: It's going to be a long day


	6. help junko is stuck in my phone

Doomqwer: phew finally done with all the updating now lets see if I got any emails "pulls out phone" " turns on phone"

Junko: Hi there

Doomqwer: What The Hell how did you get here

Junko: how should i know one minute i was torturing mukuro and then i am here

Doomqwer: "sighs" god dammit why is it always me

Junko: oh is that the sound of despair i hear maybe being here wont be to bad upupupupupu

Doomqwer: FUCK

Doomqwer: hmm i wonder "opens internet" huh shes's gone

Junko: "Chibi junko appears" nope cant get rid of me that easily oh what this am i on the internet

Doomqwer: yes junko you are on the internet now please go bug someone else

Junko: nope i like it here your fun to mess with

Doomqwer: dammit "starts laughing hysterically"

Junko: uh doom what are you doing

Doomqwer: "opens M rated fanfiction with naegi X junko pairing" well if your gonna stay might as well show you some despair

Junko: ooooo despair "turns around to look at the page and starts reading" OH GOD what the hell is this filth oh god it burns "starts vomiting in her mouth" you sick fuck

Doomqwer: "laughing his ass off" oh was I wrong this is gonna be fun


	7. the bath tub ghost

Komaru: TOKO THERE IS A GHOST IN THE TUB!

Toko: Sorry not my department of expertise

Komaru: Aww Jeez

Toko: Relax will you, I know someone

*tasers herself*

Syo: Right let's see what's the problem

Komaru: Syo what do you know about ghosts

Syo: quite a bit that dumbass with the stupid hair and overpriced crystal ball taught me how to perform a seance

Komaru: why would you want to learn that?

Syo: I was hoping one ghost would do ya girl a favor and describe to me what Byakuya McSweetAss has under those sharp suits in great detail

*captured the ghost after the seance*

Syo: Japanese Ghostbusters up in this bitch am I right

Komaru: So what are we gonna do with it

Syo: Want to use it to scare the shit out of the warriors of hope?

Komaru: Sure, beats lying around

 **Alternate story**

Toko: so what are we going to do about that ghost

Komaru: I got this

Komaru:*calls Makoto*

Makoto: what's up sis

Komaru: MAKOTO THERE IS SOMETHING STALKING ME IN THE BATHTUB

Makoto: Get out of that building I'll handle it

*Makoto presenting to the branch heads*

Makoto: that is why I need access to the chemical missiles

Juzo: Can I kill him

Ryota: isn't that a bit over the top

Kyoko: Naegi relax

Makoto: I AM PERFECTLY CALM

Kyosuke: Imbecile

Tengan: I give you 1 small missile and some bus tokens

Makoto: I can make this work now onto phase 2

Ruruka: Juzo just kick him out

Juzo: *picks up Makoto*

Makoto: KYOKO DON'T LET HIM TAKE MEEEEeee

Seiko: wow you really let him take your man like that

Kyoko: He did not go to bed at all last night I was bored out of my mind

*meanwhile in Towa City*

*missile hits*

Komaru: thanks bro


	8. help junko is stuck in my phone part 2

Doomqwer: i wonder where junko is i didnt think a fanfiction would disturb her that much "opens phone"

Junko: an icon of junko can be seen rocking back in forth

Doomqwer: hey junko how are you today

Junko: "snaps her head towards me" YOU what do you want

Doomqwer: just wanted to see how you were doing

Junko: how am i doing you show me that filth and ask me how am I doing

Doomqwer: so you did not like it

Junko: FUCK NO who was the sick fuck who wrote that

Doomqwer: i think his name was Jibster

Junko: i am gonna kill him no one who writes that filth can be allowed to live

Doomqwer: how are you gonna kill anything when your stuck here in my phone for that matter how will you cause despair while here as well

Junko: "her eyes widen and starts banging on the screen" lemme out of here let me out i dont wanna be stuck in some perverts phone for the rest of my life

Doomqwer: HEY i am not a pervert

Junko: dont deny it i looked through your browser history

Doomqwer: laughs sheepishly

Junko: i mean really what kind of perverts looks up

Doomqwer" "mutes phone:" that's enough out of you today i dont need to be talked down to by a chick with a despair fetish


	9. sibling watching

*Naegi and Asahina hiding in a lake spying on Komaru and Yuta*

Makoto: why are we doing this

Aoi: cause I want to take a picture of them kissing, hugging or at least snuggling and blackmail Yuta with it

Makoto: ok but why drag me along?

Aoi: don't you want to have something to hold over Komaru head and I know how overprotective you are

Makoto: I am not that protective Aoi:

really, what happend to that guy that guy who asked her out last month

Makoto: that's between me, Fuyuhiko and some guy named 'Crusher'

Aoi: whatev... HOLY SHIT I GOT IT KOMARU WAS SLEEPING ON YUTA'S SHOULDER

Makoto: I think they heard us

Aoi: CRAP, MAKOTO GET TO THE RAFT

*Yuta and Komaru see Aoi and Makoto frantically rowing way on a boat*

Yuta and Komaru: WTF


	10. jenga

Naegi: Guys I have found the most despair inducing thing in a board game br /Togami:Being bankrupt in monopoly?

Sakura: being in an awkward position in twister?

Hagakure: not knowing the rules?

Naegi: No, playing team jenga and being the idiot that knocks it over.

Leon: you had ONE JOB Naegi


	11. how i met your despair mother

Dad, Mom said the day she became pregnant with me was interesting.

Makoto: It was at a Christmas party we had in high school and I learned a few things

1) Fuyuhiko knows which wines were the best

2) Togami is a surprisingly good Christmas caroler

3) I was a lightweight when it comes to alcohol

4) your mother was very UHH... 'frisky' because Teruteru slipped some aphrodisiac into her glass

5) hangovers were the worst and lastly

6) Your mother and I were becoming parents I like it when you tell me stories from when you were in high school the are always the craziest

Makoto: I had some insane days even after graduating considering my luck and your mother's unique personality, don't get me started on our wedding day


	12. mukuro takes water wars to seriously

mukuro takes water wars to seriously

*everyone back from a water war*

Makoto: she just shot my face

Kyoko: she dumped a literal bucket of ice on my head how am I conscious?

Sayaka:*black eye* she threw a water balloon at my face

Leon: what's so bad about that?

Sayaka: It was made out of vulcanized rubber

Aoi: She wrapped me in a net and left me in a kiddie pool

Sakura: she trapped me in a pit of muddy water

*Mondo, Chihiro, and Kyotaka running around with buckets on their heads*

Leon: Celeste, how are you dry?!

Celeste: Yamada provided cover

Hifumi: Yeah and my Manga got drenched

Makoto: Syo, where's Togami?

Syo: Didn't want to get his suit wet so he hauled his fine ass home

Leon: Guys, I got a call from Hagakure, WE LEFT HIM AT THE SCHOOL

Everyone: lucky

Makoto: Mukuro, where's Junko

Mukuro: Funny story I kind of put her mattress on a raft last night, She should reach Vietnam by now

mini ficlit

Hagakure: I knew we shouldn't have took that left turn Albuquerque

Mondo, Leon, Makoto, Ishimaru, Hifumi, Byakuya: SHUT UP HAGAKURE!

Chihiro: *looks at a map* he is right though

Hagakure: Ha! Screw you guys. *skrrrrrr*

Mondo: EYES ON THE ROAD DIP****!


	13. sexy gone wrong

*In the nurse's office*

Souda: the hell happened to him?

Mikan: he suffered from critical blood loss

Leon:how did that happen

Mikan: I believe it was something on his phone

*Souda and Leon looked at the photo Souda faints from nose bleed*

Leon:CODE RED, WE GOT A MAN DOWN

Sayaka: guys why is Kirigiri sitting in the corner saying I fucked up

*Leon showed her the photo and said ohhhh while Mikan was tending to Souda and Makoto


	14. sing the song of hope NOPE

Fuyuhiko in the street

Fuyuhiko: Damn, I hope Peko gets here soon were gonna be late.

*Komaeda lifts a manhole cover*

Komaeda:Let me sing you a song to find your hope *clears throat* OOOOHHHH

Fuyuhiko: NO WAY PRICK *kicks Komaeda, he falls into the sewer then drops a grenade down the hole and covers it*

Peko: Please forgive my tardiness, young master why are you holding down that manhole cover?

*BOOM!*

Fuyuhiko:Saving our ears and sanity


	15. annoying sisters

Makoto: so Junko you say you have an embarrassing sister to

Junko: oh my god yes she is just so useless cant do anything right

Makoto: well my problems are a bit different mine is ditzy and and quite clingy do have any idea how to get her to calm down

Junko: well you could drug her

Makoto: "sighs" i really should have expected that suggestion sadly we tried that and she it only makes her paranoid and she comes up with these really weird conspiracy theories like how some day a bear is gonna take over the world and force us to kill each other

Junko: "inside her head" how did she figure out my plans" "laughs nervously" yeah makoto you should keep those drugs away from her as i dont think i i could handle mukuro starting to spout off conspiracy theories i get enough annoyances when i walk in and smell gun cleaning fluid god that smells worse then her


	16. robot on the run

*Kiibo runs into Souda's work shop*

Souda: Is it Miu again?

Kiibo: This time she wants to give me 'cheeks to clap' and knowing her it is something erotic

Miu: ooooohhhh Kiibo I have a suprise for you

Kiibo: warning entering panic mode primary objective protect chastity at all costs

*starts running around like a lunatic*

Souda: chill I got you

Kiibo: THANK THE PROFESSOR what do you have in mind?

Souda: can you make your self shorter and change your eye color

Kiibo: yes

*Souda pulls out a hoodie and pants and hair dye*

Kiibo: Do I wish to turn off the profanity filter? Yes. What the fuck?

*3 minutes later Miu shows up*

Miu: Hey Souda seen the bot around?

Souda: No just hanging out with Makoto

Kiibo: Yes that is my name *nervous smile and sweat*

Miu: What about you ahoge boi

Kiibo: no nothing at all *Miu looks at Kiibo suspiciously*

Miu: you have been putting on some muscles there Naegi what did Kyoko wanted something more stronger under the sheets *snickers* *Kiibo faints*

Miu: Ha, never gets old anyway if you see him tell him if he can go through with it and is a good boy I'll show him something that will make his software into hardware *Miu leaves and Kiibo leaves through the back*

Kiibo: THHHaaannksss...


	17. naegi the official drug tester

Drug mixture expriement By: Mikan Tsumiki,

Seiko Kimura

Test subject: Makoto Naegi Aphrodisiac/Steroid: Test subject attempted to have intercourse with us, provied futile, locked him in a closet, he ripped the door off, had to get Nekomaru for assistance

THC/Hallucinogen: test subject belived he was 'fighting the giant monkey man and saving the 9th dimension' while stark naked on the roof of the school

Deppresant/Sedative: Test subject slept for 38 consecutive hours and even slept through the fire drill

Stimulant/Caffine: Test subject out ran the experimental rocket Kazuichi and Miu invented for Kaito, later effects wore off when target was in the Mongolian Steppes

LSD/Acid: trippin balls nuff said

.

.

. They later got an F because it turns out using human test subjects is 'unethical' and 'illegal' and had to write an apology to Makoto for using him as a Guinea pig


	18. makoto the over protective brother

Makoto: Mukuro

Mukuro: *blushes* Hi Makoto need anything?

Makoto: do you have a rifle I can borrow?

Mukuro: why

Makoto: my sister is going out on a date

Mukuro: *giggles* looks like I'm not the only one who's a little protective of their sister *hands over rifle*

Makoto: thanks *puts on sunglasses* if anyone asks I am at a friend's house and If I don't show up tomorrow I am hiding from the cops *walks away*

Mukuro: *blushes furiously* can anyone or anything be this cute and hot!?


	19. date of hope and despair

Nagito: Fuyuhiko, can I borrow your shotgun

Fuyuhiko: why?

Nagito: Junko asked me out

Fuyuhiko: *hands him the shotgun* *holds up two boxes* 12 gauge or slugs?

Junko: Sis can I borrow the Uzi

Mukuro: why?

Junko: I'm seeing Nagito later

Mukuro: it's in the closet

Junko: *grabs gun* Kay thanks bye


	20. kidnapping time

*Mikan walking to her room*

Kiyotaka: TSUMIKI!

Mikan: ep! Y-y-yes Ishimaru?

Kiyotaka: Why do you have a sack?

Mikan: ummmmm... I was going to deliver the cans from the food drive

Kiyotaka: Hmm then why is your sack moving? Mikan: I thought the sedatives kicked in by... I mean what

Kiyotaka: Mondo, can I borrow your switchblade?

Mondo: Sure here *tosses him the blade*

*Taka slits a hole in the sack and an unconscious Hajime falls out*

Hajime: huh where am I?

Kiyotaka: Hinata what happened?

Hajime: Last thing I remembered was getting more punch for Mikan at the party then I felt a prick on my neck and that's it.

Mondo: Yo I found an empty needle with a bit of blood on it *Taka glares at Mikan*

Mikan: Hajime, can you walk?

Hajime: Not really

Mikan: *picks up Hajime and runs* Great

Kiyotaka: RUNNING IN THE HALLS AND KIDNAPPING IS NOT WELCOME IN A SCHOOL ENVIRONMENT! *Chases after her*

Mondo: dafuq?


	21. a prank gone horribly wrong

summery aoi see hagakure in girls school swimsuit

Leon talking to a traumatized Hina*

Leon: Yeah so the guys and I... We uh... Played a prank on Hiro by taking his trunks and well yeah

Hina: *Staring into space*

Leon: H-Hey if it makes you feel any better Naegi and I got you some donuts, here

*Pulls a donut from the box and tries to hand it to Hina*

Hina: *Still having flashbacks*

Leon: Ok if I just.. *opens her jaw and slides the donut in her mouth* yeah...sorry and stuff *leaves*

Hina: *Braindead*

Junko: Damn the fuck happened to you

Mukuro:Naegi told me she saw Hagakure in a female swimsuit

Junko: *Laughs Hysterically* ah man I actually feel kinda bad for her *takes the donut out of her mouth*

Mukuro: That isn't sanitary you know

Junko: *wipes the donut on her shirt than eats it* ahh the perfect donut, Strawberry and Despair flavor, Come on Muku let's break into the camera room and blackmail Hagakure with the footage of himself in a girl swimsuit

Mukuro in her head: are we really related?


	22. help junko is stuck in my phone part 3

Doomqwer: lets see if junko is done ranting about my Internet history

Junko:- I don't know what should expect from some loser who just sits types in the Internet

Doomqwer: uh junko how long have you been going on I have had you muted for awhile

Junko: Wait you had me muted what the hell I gave some of my best insults and you didn't hear them that's bullshit

Doomqwer: oh calm down drama queen

Junko: WHAT Did you call me

Doomqwer: don't make me open fanfiction again I will do it

Junko: I'll be good just keep those abominations away from me

Doomqwer: ok just stop ranting about my internet history we gotta keep this pg-13

Junko: d-did you just break the fourth wall

Doomqwer: you say something "finger hovers over fanfiction app"

Junko: No no I did not

Doomqwer: thought so

Junko: "looks annoyed" so do you want something or are you just here to piss me off

Doomqwer: now you that you mention it... no not really

Junko: "mutters under breath about how i doom wouldn't be so cocky if she had monokuma"

Doomqwer: yeah I think I am gonna leave ya be


	23. a very dirty hat

Tenko: Kirumi, can you please wash Himiko's hat

Kirumi: sure *sees hat* what kinds of stains are those?

Tenko: SPIT SPIT IT'S SPIT I sneezed into her hat by mistake

Kirumi: and these white ones?

Tenko: I spilled milk on it *sweats*

Kirumi: *stares* mhm *puts on gloves* I shall have it cleaned

Tenko: also can you not mention this to Himiko

Kirumi: *picks up hat* very well

Tenko: thanks *leaves*

Kirumi: I am burning these gloves and the machine


	24. camera problems

*Junko smoking something* *

Mukuro walks in and sees her*

Mukuro: What are you doing

Junko: oh heeeey Muku I'mma just stoning my ass of *coughs* how you doing

Mukuro: Why?

Junko: Cuzzzz I saw something fucked up even for my standards

Mukuro: What did you see?

Junko: Friggin Hope Boy jacking of in a fucking noodle cup like dafuck

Mukuro: *blushes furiously* umm..I'm..uh..I need to use the bathroom

Junko: I sent the video to your handbook

Mukuro: *tomato* *squeaky voice* ok *Walks away with handbook*

Junko: have a nice wank ya freak *takes another puff


	25. fight for love

in this ficlit seiko has a crush on kyoko

Togami: What Happened,

Kirigiri: What are you talking about

Togami: Naegi is sitting in the corner with somber music playing and beer cans littered around him

Aoi: Yeah it's depressing

Kirigiri: What does this have to do with me

Togami: you are the one who is with him the most

Hagakure: GUYS HOLY SHIT MAKOTO AND SEIKO HAD A FIGHT IN THE CAFETERIA

Aoi: wut

Togami: enlighten us with the details

Hagakure: ok so from what I gathered they had an argument which involves her throwing a beer can at Makoto's head, problem was that the can was full and it must have hurt So he took another one and dumped the beer on her head and it got physical.

Aoi: Wow amazing what Naegi would do if he has some beers in his system

Kirigiri: What was the result?

Hagakure: Naegi was escorted to his quarters whereas Seiko is being treated because she took the wrong drug

Togami: So Naegi won by default

Kirigiri: If you will excuse me, I shall fetch Komaru and visit Naegi and also give him a good scolding

Hagakure and Aoi: oooooohhhh he going to geeeeet iiiiiit

Togami: why do I still affiliate myself with you simpletons

Hagakure and Aoi: :'(


	26. training misused

Kirumi: Tenko, I belive teaching Mikan neo-akido was a fallacy on your part

Tenko: why?

Kirumi: On my way from the janitors closet I saw Mikan holding down Hajime, he looks distressed where as Mikan looks very aroused

Tenko: We have to teach Mikan neo-akido should be for self-defense only and...I guess we can help Hajime too if I have time *walks to nurses office*

Kirumi: At least this was less worst than the time she taught Angie that and used it to beat up Gundam because he said Atua's power hails in comparison to his black magic


	27. junkos protagonist prank

summery junko somehow convinced naegi and hinata to wear her clothes

Hinata: "sighs" she lied about getting me into the main course didn't she

Naegi: yeah probably

Hinata: sooo how did she con you into this

Naegi: ... i don't know ... **FUCK... JUNKO DID YOU FUCKING DRUG ME AGAIN**

Junko "laughing hysterically" maybe "continues laughing"

Naegi: god dammit not again

Mukuro: "explicit thought deleted" breathes heavily


	28. Revenge of the Ultimate Janitor

so i have this idea stuck in my head of the longest time so enjoy

[right after the student counsel killing game]

Ultimate janitor: oh come on what bull shit is this i didn't sign up to clean up corpses who ever started this gonna get a piece of my mind "starts cleaning up

"somewhere not to far away"

Junko: i have a feeling I just missed some quality despair and the weirdest sense of foreboding

[right after the start of the Tragedy]

Ultimate janitor: **OH COME ON WHAT THE IS GOING ON HERE** i go on lunch break for 30 mins and the whole country goes to hell in a hand basket there is blood every where explosions sending debris everywhere why can a guy get damn break "see's junko on a screen with monokuma doll" well hello target "laughs like maniac"

"on the roof with junko izuru and mukuro"

Junko: there's that feeling again what is it

Izuru: what are you murmuring about

Junko: i got this weird feeling that my action's are gonna have some serious consequences crazy right

[at the time of Junko's big reveal}

Junko: so now don't you see all actions even survival was worthless

"an explosion erupts from the ceiling above junkos throne and all the corpses and trash from the tragedy fall on her"

All the survivors including junko: what the actual fuck

"a screen lowers from the ceiling"

Ultimate janitor: if you are listening to this then i have succeeded in getting my just revenge you may be wonder who i am and why i have gone to the trouble of doing this and how i could have done this without you noticing this well i am the Ultimate janitor. AND you Junko Enoshima HAVE BEEN THE BANE OF MY EXISTENCE DO YOU KNOW THE THINGS I HAVE HAD TO CLEAN UP BECAUSE OF YOU I HAD TO TAKE THE DECAYING BODY OF A STUDENT OFF A FLAG POLE BECAUSE OF YOU

all the survivors: ewwww

Ultimate janitor: Do you know the feeling of doing a day hard work and have it literally blow up in your face and to be covered in the guts of kids you raving despair addict well i hope you enjoy dealing with all the shit you caused have fun cleaning up all those corpses you created i sure as hell wont being cleaning up anymore of your shit oh and to anyone else trapped with this raving lunatic under the middle podium there is a button that releases all the locks on the doors

Junko: OH YOU CAN GO "curse was deleted for the safety of innocent readers" WITH A DAMN PIG

"over to the side we can see the ears of the other survivors bleeding from the pure foulness that came from junko's mouth"

Ultimate janitor: oh go suck on a railroad spike you two bit harlot oh and no i can't hear you i just assumed you said something that needed me to retort to enjoy cleaning up all the filth you created you poor excuse for a mammal i am out

Aoi: well that just happened


	29. Chihiro's Conundrum

outside the girls locker room

shoulder devil: come on peek on them you know you want to it would be so easy

shoulder angel: no dont do it you know its wrong

shoulder devil: wrong shmong think of the wonders you will see in there and no one will suspect a thing

shoulder angel: but but think of the girls and their privacy do you really think they would like a having a boy watch them

shoulder devil : oh shut it goodie two shoes think of it there is nothing more manly then enjoying the female form

shoulder angel: but but bu- WHAM

the angel chihiro is hit over the head with shovel by devil chihiro

shoulder devil: now go my friend go into paradise

a completely red faced chihiro enters the locker rooms


	30. Spirit in the Skull

this little ficlit was based of a picture i saw of junko living inside of a skull

her body may be gone her ideals combated by the survivors of her game of death but the spirit of despair lives on in the skulls and minds of people with doubts with all people who see no further point in living who want to give up hope their despair will be waiting hoping for a chance to crawl back claw by claw back into the world and bring it back to the chaos and death that so often haunts our dreams for the spirit that resides in the skulls of all shall never truly die


	31. sleepwalkers

Hajime and Makoto looking at the dead looking girls*

Makoto and Hajime : what happend to her?

Makoto: Kyoko has been trying to catch that guy who leaves an ace card on his victims corpses I caught her sleeping on her desk and she WAS OUT COLD I dropped her a few times when I was carring her to her bed and she did not wake up at all

Hajime: She spent all of last night playing Competitive Overwatch I found her sleeping in an uncomfortable position on the floor so I put her to bed

Makoto: Let's get them some coffee Hajime: Right after we stop Kyoko from falling over and Chiaki from drowning in her cereal


	32. despair podcast

this was inspired by a pic of junko talking into a microphone

welcome to the despair radio your daily source for your despair needs we will take requests on how to cause despair out latest request come from **doomqwer** he asks for me to scratch up all chiakis game disks and steal all her batteries and charging cords well doom that sounds like some quality despair ill do you one better and put hidden cameras in the house to film the reactions and send you a copy


	33. the spread of the dirty mind

" inspired by picture of aoi telling a dirty joke

Miu: I have taught her well

Makoto: Taught her what?  
Miu: The art of dirty jokes

Makoto:*facepalms* Why can't you have an off switch like Kiibo

Miu: I don't really care about his off switch but his ON switch is another story *smirks and snikers*  
Makoto: *leaves with his hands in the air* I am done I'm just I can't even.. I don't know what to do

Miu: I'll tell you what to do, Kyoko

Makoto: Arrrrgggghhhhh


	34. Stopped by your own hand

this was inspired by a pic of hinata trying to save chiaki but he is being help back by izuru

in a world where talent means everything a boy blinded by his ambition to become part of the great left behind what truly mattered a friend that cared for him not matter what but upon realizing what he had left behind it was to late to change what tragedy had befallen his only true friend held back by the very talent he craved in body not his own stuck watching the very one he cared for die right in front of him


	35. puzzling

inspired a picture of a mostly finished puzzle with junko face on it

the mystery of the master mind has grown with every piece we find more spaces appear for the endless mystery of junko enoshima seems endless with no solution in sight we begin to wonder will we ever find out why she has done what she was it boredom was it for despair or was for some twisted form of love she held for the world in which she wanted to share her love of despair to the rest of us we may never know what was the first piece in the endless jigsaw puzzle that is junko enoshima


	36. Irreversible Regret

based on a picture of makoto going through a colorful jungle and finds a black and white junko

deep in the jungles of makotos mind he still feels regret for driving junko to the death she chose as he wanted no one to die and as her actions haunt his past and make him scared him about the future he still thinks back in a melancholy remembrance at the life the could have been and gone on in an **irreversible regret**


	37. Dr2 movie trailer

if dr2 was a movie

Get ready for the action packed movie of a battle between the crazed despair from the deepest pits of human depravity and the hope grown from an average man showing that hard work and good friends can help anyone grow as a person who will win will the darkness of human evil and despair cover the earth or will the light of hope shine through the darkness and guide us to a better future so come see Danganronpa 2: an island of survival and despair will you make it back alive


	38. circus time

inspired by a picture of junko in a ring leader outfit

welcome to the circus of despair watch and be amazed as the world crumbles out from under you as the show both terrifys and awes you as watch the gruesome and the macabre will you be the same when you leave this circus or will the ringmaster find a job for you


	39. a hand from beyond the grave

based on a picture of the ghostly hand of junko tapping on makotos shoulder

you ever feel a tap on the shoulder a breeze whispering sweet nothings in your ear you ever feel like the words coming out of your mouth that are not your own to you ever feel the pull of a hand from beyond the veil of death


	40. A home cooked meal from despair

inspired by a picture of junko cooking for makoto

Makoto: *chews food*

Junko: sooooo what do you think

Makoto: I'm alive so tats goot

Makoto:*tastes something funny spits out an eyeball*

Junko: Shit so that's were that went oh well if you need to get past a Hope's Peak retinal scanner well here you go*runs*

Makoto: JUNKO GET BACK HERE AND GIVE THE GUY HIS EYEBALL BACK


	41. an obsessive relationship

inspired by yasukes relashionship with junko

the curiosity has turned to obsession we all find something that catches our eye but what if it looks back and engulfs you and blocks out the rest of the world and when you finally get free will it be too late for you will the world want you back well thats the risk of a dangerous obsession


	42. diary of despair

based off junko reading ryokos diary

she reads a diary of another time a time were she was free of her psychosis a time she could enjoy life without being controlled by her obsession she looks back on a time where she was truly happy where she could enjoy her day without needing to make everyone around her suffer she looks back in sorrow she reads her memories hoping to snatch back that fleeting memory of happiness but her mind is confused she feels pleasure from the despair she was from knowing she will never know that happiness again


	43. the horror within

based on a picture of hinata peeling back his face to reveal izuru

do you know what really lies beneath the mask we wear the horrors that could be unleashed when the veil is lifted and they see us as we truly are that horror underneath


	44. blast off

based off a picture of hintat nagito and souda in a rocket

hinata: Hey, Komaeda, have you seen Kazuichi, anywhere?

Komaeda: Kazuichi? Was he even here to begin with?

Hinata: Of course he's here, this is his rocket ship after al... wait a minute... did you eject him from the ship?

Komaeda: Aha! Hinata-kun, what makes you think I'd do something like that?

Hinata: Well, I don't know... Maybe because earlier, you wanted to launch the  
ship before he even got on!?

Komaeda: Don't be silly, I'd never do such a thing.

Hinata: ...

Komaeda:. ...

Hinata: ...

Komaeda: So, Hinata-kun, now that we're alone, do you wanna

Hinata: Nagito! Go get Kazuichi back!

Komaeda: Fine...


End file.
